Recognizing the change

“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.”
― Albert Einstein

Everyone has a certain image of herself/himself. I have an actual picture in my head when I think about myself. And to be honest, I think that this picture has been out of date for awhile, stuck somewhere when I was in college. I am in my late twenties now and just until recently I used that image in certain situations. Now when I am doing a lot of self analysis, self reflection and exploration, I realize that this girl is long gone. In this post, I wanted to talk about accepting changes in yourself.

I would have never called myself a procrastinator. Ever. I even had a title of Overachiever. My school papers were always written way before the deadline. All of my payments would be done manually before the due date. For any event or presentation, I would be always very well prepared in advance. Any little thing would be a list item in my head with a plan how to accomlish it. I would show up to any meetings 5 min earlier.

Well, it occurred to me the other day that things changed. I am always 5-10 min late, everywhere. It is almost the middle of July and my car registration sticker still says 6… I have friends coming to visit tomorrow and I just cleaned my house and my car. I don’t know when I am supposed to take my dog to the vet next time (I used to!). At work, I am cutting close to internal deadlines for writing assessments, completing tasks and so on. What happened to me? Where is responsible me? Great panic comes when I start just thinking about it.

But is it really that bad? I am still a list maker and item cross checker and things get done. Thanks to modern technology, there are so many helpful tools available! I don’t have to keep things in my head anymore. I love GoogleKeep, phone calendar, making reminders by voice on my phone. Eventually, I moved all my payments to auto. I know that there is forgiveness period for car registration, the vet people would usually call me to remind about the appointment. If I complete something right by deadline, I end up saving myself more time because I am more concentrated and proactive, versus giving myself an opportunity to rethink, rewrite, reanalyze. I tend to do small things immediately when they come up so that they are out of my way. And at the end of the day, I am so much less stressed out.

I still don’t call myself procrastinator. I am just more flexible. I give myself a slack. This is one part of me that changed and I am accepting this change (or at least I am trying as I tend to be hard on myself and be a control freak – different topic). Observe changes in yourself. Most likely these changes made you a better person!

Published by mindtrainpassenger

I like to dwell on things, contemplate and play games with my mind, most of the time I ride along but I get off sometimes! I am an explorer, thinker, friend, wife, dog owner, hiker, mountain biker but I prefer to stay anonymous.

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